Thursday, April 17, 2014




An asexual and pansexual become room-mates and have wacky adventures

The show is called ‘All or Nothing’

Plot twist: the asexual is really super outgoing and is a huge flirt while the pansexual is extremely socially awkward and has trouble ordering coffee let alone getting a date.


my hand slipped

Thursday, April 3, 2014


Fact: Pansexuals are greedy. Even greedier than their bisexual sister species. It is very common for a pansexual to hoard sexual partners like a dragon hoards treasure. An unrelated fact: Pansexuals are dragons.

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Anonymous said: i thought you were pansexual but you have a boyfriend,why would you lie about your sexuality


you said u were going to mcdonalds but you got chicken mcnuggets not a big mac why would u lie about going to mcdonalds

is essentially what you have just said to me

Friday, March 7, 2014


Since us pansexuals, bisexuals, and asexuals “don’t exist,” we are able to walk through other planes and worlds of non-existence. This is why so very few of us can be found during winter and summer break; we are likely taking summer classes at Hogwarts or vacationing in Isengard-gard-gard.

(Source: kamala-k)

Monday, February 17, 2014


We get asked what is up with the non-monosexual people who choose to use one or more of a wide variety of Personal Identity Labels (i.e. Ambisexual, Anthrosexual, Flexisexual, Fluid, Heretoflexible/Homoflexible, No Labels, Multisexual, Omnisexual, Pansexual, PoMosexual, Polysexual, Sapiosexual, et. al. … if we left yours out it was by error and no disrespect was meant) instead of bisexual, at least once a day maybe more.

Sad to say that frequently there is a lot of hurt behind the questions. Although looking at the data, bisexual is the Umbrella or Community Identity Label used by the preponderance of non-monosexual people (more than 90%) some of those that use other labels tend to be quite passionate about their choice and can accidentally get a little carried away in describing why they like theirs best of all.

We really like how RitchAndFamous talks about the entire thing. Actually we ♥ most everything they do and urge everyone to follow them.

I love you as a pansexual, I love you as a bisexual, or whatever else you want to identify as. But just remember that when you tell me my identity is wrong, you’re like the billionth person, for the billionth reason.

This is just kind of an explanation as to why the debate is so tense for bisexual identified people. Check out this great article by Shiri Eisner for more: Words, binary and biphobia, or: why “bi” is binary but “FTM” is not via RitchandFamous

Wednesday, January 22, 2014



what im saying is that bisexuals, pansexual, and asexuals should all join together so we can be in the fictitious trifecta. enough people will say we’re not real and we’ll all converge together in a massive, fierce mass only spoken of in myth.  dont come near us or you too will cease to exist


Tuesday, November 5, 2013

friendly-firefly said: What's your opinion on the idea that, if we take the definition of bisexual to mean having the capacity to be sexually attracted to people of the same gender as you and also people not of the same gender, the label 'pansexual' is rendered pointless?


Here is the thing. The historic definition of Bisexuality as defined by the Bisexual Community (as opposed to our enemies or those who are merely indifferent to us) since the beginning of the modern civil rights movement (late 1960’s/eary 1970’s) has basically Always Been those with the ability to be attracted to those of the SAME gender/sex as you and those who are of a DIFFERENT sex/gender then you. 

Or as the well know bisexual activist & speaker Robyn Och’s puts is, "I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge that I have in myself the potential to be attracted - romantically and/or sexually - to people of more than one sex and/or gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree."

▼ Community Identity Labels such as Bisexual (or Lesbian or Gay or Straight, or Queer, etc.) describe our commonalities and give us a space to be together.
Personal Identity Labels serve a vital function for individuals: they describe my difference and give me a space in which to be unique.

Looking at the data, Bisexual is the Umbrella or Community Identity Label used by the preponderance of people (more than 90%) for the entire non-monosexual community.

Pansexual as well as a very large number of other terms, that vary by things such as geographical location, (i.e Fluid in Southern California spreading up the cost and inland from there, Omnisexual in western NY State/parts of Pennsylvanian, etc., etc.) as well as age, gender and socioeconomic background and other demographic differences are non-monosexual Personal Identity Labels that may reflect a particular attitude towards ideas such as Gender Theory.

So basically we don’t think that any words people feel comfortable using to further clarify who they are to themselves and to others are irrelevant. We further wish to point out that many people in the entire Queer Nation use a variety of compound identifiers. For example: gay men might be drag-queens, twinks, bears, etc.; lesbians may be butch, femme, AG, lipstick-lesbians, etc. So as far as we are concerned  it is wonderful, and helpful, and liberating, and creative, that we have BiDykes, Bisexual Queers, Transgender Bisexual Political Nerds, etc.

What we don’t find wonderful is the deliberate misstatement of and rewriting the history of bisexuality and bisexual people.

And frankly we find that upon careful investigation not to mention discussions with the (equally confused, worried & upset)Trans/Gender Non-Conforming Communities that Most if not All of THAT is coming from forces outside Both of our Communities, who have always been strong historic allies. Forces that have not always been kind to the “B” and the “T” in LGBT and that on many occasions have shown a tendency to value money, power and prestige over the common good. 

May we most strongly suggest that all people of good will who have been led to believe that Bisexual refers only to cisheteronormative/cishomonormative people and that the term is implicitly binariest, possibly transphobic and that it somehow reinforces false western gender norms please take a moment to read these important documents:

We hope all of this both answers your particular question as well as helps clarify a number of points of confusion we have lately been seeing on tumblr.

Friday, October 25, 2013

A gay man with a Bear Flag on the back of his sleeveless denim jacket may very well be announcing to the world that he is a Bear, or is only interested in his Bear – but he does not then reject the umbrella label of Gay. If you said to him, “So, that flag with the paw print, that means you’re not gay, right?” they would laugh in their face. Of course he’s gay, he’s a fracking Bear! (Please note that for accuracy, of course there are bisexual Bears. In this particular case, I’ve stipulated that the Bear or Bear-lover is gay.)

So why are bisexuals expected to a) discuss extremely personal details and b) have the word they use to describe their sexual orientation in the broadest possible terms reflect that level of detail?

Every one of us on this hurtling ball of dirt is a very complex individual. We all have the right to describe ourselves to whatever level of detail we’re comfortable with. We don’t need a single word to attempt to specify these complexities, we need to be able to describe ourselves in broad and general terms and reserve as much of our complexities for our intimates as we need to.

And that’s why I keep sweating over labels. Because they are meant to be descriptive, not prescriptive.

You. Straight guy reading this. You don’t feel attraction to that woman over there because you’re straight, you’re straight because out of the set of all possible people that you are attracted to, they will all share the attribute of being female-identified. I seriously doubt you’re attracted to every woman on the planet, though.

I’m bi because I am attracted to both people who are identified as being the same gender as myself, and people who identify as genders other than myself. This includes people who transcend gender, or who transition between poles of a gender binary. I don’t have these attractions because I’m bi, though – I would have them whether I have a label or not.

And it describes a large set of people I am potentially attracted to. It’s essentially the set of {all adult people I’m not related to}. But just because all the people who I am attracted to are in this set, it doesn’t mean that I am attracted to everyone in this set.

Because that’s all that the broad, general labels are – descriptions of very large sets of people that you can potentially be attracted to. For straight, or for gay or lesbian, for monosexuals in other words, the set is {half the population}. For me, it’s {just about everybody}.

But this set, for everyone, contains a much smaller set, the set of {people I am actually attracted to}. And for everyone, of every label, that smaller set is pretty small indeed, and while there may be words for more common subsets, it doesn’t mean that the big set is invalid.

Bisexuality confuses many people who aren’t bisexual – and, honestly, some people who are, but have internalized some or all of the negative messages laid on us by the mononormative world. They want to find out exactly who I can be attracted to, because that makes me easier to stick in a box, so that they can stay in their boxes. Hey, boxes are comfortable. You see me wandering around outside of a box, you figure that means the walls of your box have an exit too, and you’re either afraid you will find it, or afraid that you won’t.

This question, “so what is your precise spectrum of attraction?”, is nothing more than an attempt to stick me back in a damned box. No thanks. I’ll answer it if I have to, because let’s face it, as someone who is very public about his sexuality I have to accept that I will have to be comfortable answering questions that someone who is private about the personal stuff like sexual orientation and religion and position on the Autism Spectrum wouldn’t be. It’s part of my job, as an activist, as someone who wants to make changes in society, and I understand that a lot of the time the question is well-meant.

But there is absolutely no need for such a personal, intimate, and specific question to be answered by the single word of an identity label. No reason those who choose to answer it shouldn’t, but they should not be expected to do it with one word. And it should not be a standard that only non-monosexual identity should be expected to adhere to, in one word or many.

What’s In a Word, Eponymous Fliponymous (via mrskarkatharley)

(Source: rinmemesuoka)

Friday, October 18, 2013


fun facts about pansexual/bisexual “people”:

  • we are actually greedy. not because we like more than one gender, but because we’re really all leprechauns dressed as people. we gave the gays the rainbow, but we’ll keep the pot o’ gold if you know what i mean
  • we are very, very confused. not because we like more than one gender, but because pansexual/bisexual people are notorious philosophers. why are we here? where do we come from? is the cafeteria serving pizza today? pansexual/bisexual leprechauns people seek to answer all these questions and more
  • we are pretending and we’ll come out eventually. as leprechauns. one day, we’ll all come out as leprechauns, and inherit the earth. really, i don’t know why you’re so enthused about us coming out as one of your human identities at all. enjoy your time as dominant species while it lasts, honestly

(Source: queerkents)

Sunday, September 15, 2013









Rebloggable by request.

Links found in the original post:

  • Here is a good post by a bisexual person on pansexual people misdefining bisexuality.”
  • Here is a good post by a pansexual on problematic definitions of pansexuality.”
  • This and this are prime examples [of pansexual people claiming themselves as the breakers of the gender binary].”
  • “See my previous posts on nonbinary people in nonmonosexual communities here, here, and here.”


wow this expresses so many things that I could never quite process

What about pansexual people who don’t hate on bi people or mis-define bisexuality? What about pan people who aren’t ignorant towards trans* identities? What about pansexual people who have trans* identities? Why does every other post I see on pansexuality have these broad generalizations about what pansexual people say and think? 

Congratulations on the most roundabout version of “we’re not all like that” I’ve ever seen.

Nowhere did I say “all pan people.” I used cis and binary identity qualifiers where relevant. And by the way, binary trans*people perpetuate a lot of binarism and nonbinary erasure.

So what about all those pan people who “aren’t like that” that I didn’t talk about? What do you want, a pat on the back? A fruit basket with a card saying “congratulations on not personally being one of the people who misrepresent, appropriate, and generally shit on my identity”? I don’t owe you a fucking mention, not one.


Okay both the original post and the later comment are pure gold.

Given the amount of crap on my dash today, I figured it was about time to bring this back.

(Source: warp-factor-gr8)

Thursday, February 21, 2013



what the fuck even is my sexuality: the musical

starring me

including great hits such as

oh no he’s hot

oh shit she’s hot too

why is everyone hot

and everyone’s favorite

how did i used to think i was straight?

(Source: eggrollkingdom)

Saturday, January 12, 2013


I just.

I hate that there’s this huge prejudice against gay people having their own ‘sexual awakening’. If a straight guy finds out he fancies guys sometimes and is actually bisexual or even gay, in general the world shrugs and moves on. But in my experience, if a gay guy sleeps with a girl and discovers he’s actually bisexual, there’s a whole lot more freaking out. A lot of people seem to think that if you identify first as gay instead of straight, you’ve used up your quota for changing your sexuality. It’s like if you decide you’re not straight, you only have once chance to get your sexuality right, wheras if you are straight you have free reign to eventally decide you’re bi or asexual or pansexual or anything, really.

-/end rant

(Source: murmuredlullabye)

Friday, November 16, 2012

The monosexual privilege checklist



  1. Society assures me that my sexual identity is real and that people like me exist.
  2. When disclosing my sexual identity to others, they believe it without requiring me to prove it.
  3. I can feel sure that upon disclosing my sexual identity, people accept that it’s my real/actual sexual identity (rather than anything other than I said)***.
  4. I am never considered closeted when disclosing my sexual identity.
  5. Perception/acceptance of my sexual identity is generally independent of my choices of relationships, partners and lifestyle.
  6. It is unlikely that disclosing my sexual identity will be taken as a sexual offer or a sign of sexual consent.
  7. I can be confident that people don’t misname*** my sexual identity or use different identities to describe my identity when speaking about me.
  8. When seen with a partner I’m dating, I can be certain to be recognized as a member of my sexual identity group.
  9. I never have to worry about successfully passing as a member of my sexual identity group or as a member of my community.
  10. I do not have to choose between either invisibility (“passing”) or being consistently “othered” and/or tokenized based on my sexual identity.
  11. I am never blamed for upholding heteropatriarchy** or cisgender* privilege because of the word that I use to identify my sexuality.
  12. My politics are not questioned based on the the word that I use to identify my sexuality.
  13. I feel welcomed at appropriate services or events that are segregated by sexual identity (such as ‘general’; i.e. straight clinics, gay community centers, lesbian-only events, etc.)
  14. If I’m cisgender, I am accepted and celebrated as a part of “queer” space or movement. If I’m an ally, I am applauded for my support of the queer movement.
  15. If I’m cisgender, queer or gay people will not try to exclude me from our movements in order to gain political legitimacy for themselves. I am never accused of “giving the movement a bad name”; or of “exploiting” the movement.
  16. I can feel sure that if I choose to enter a monogamous relationship, my friends, community or my partner will continue to accept my sexual identity, without expecting or pressuring me to change it.
  17. I needn’t worry about potential partners shifting instantly from amorous to disdain, humiliation or verbal violence because of my sexual identity.
  18. I can cheat on my partners or act badly in a relationship without having other people put this down to my sexual identity or have my behaviour reflect badly on all the people in my sexual identity group.
  19. I can choose to be in a polyamorous relationship without being accused of reinforcing stereotypes against my sexual identity group.
  20. I can fairly easily find representations of people of my sexual identity group and my lifestyle in the media and the arts. I encounter such representations without needing to look hard.
  21. If I encounter a fictional, historical or famous figure of my sexual identity, I can be sure that s/he will be named as such in the text or by the media, reviewers and audience.
  22. I often encounter the word I use to identify myself in the media and the arts. When I hear or read it, I am far less likely to find it in the context of its denial.
  23. I can find, fairly easily, reading material, institutions, media representations, etc. which give attention specifically to people of my sexual identity.
  24. I can feel certain that normal everyday language will include my sexual identity (“straight and gay alike”, “gay and lesbian”, etc.)
  25. If I am cisgender, I am far less likely to suffer from intimate violence.
  26. If I am cisgender, I am less likely to suffer from depression or to contemplate suicide.
  27. If I am cisgender, I am far less likely to suffer from poverty.
  28. I am more likely to feel comfortable being open about my sexual identity at work.
  29. I have access to information about the prevalence of STI’s in my community as well as prevention methods that are suitable for me.
  30. If I live in a city, I can expect to find medical care that will suit my own particular needs.
  31. I am less likely to risk my health by avoiding medical treatment.
  32. Wronging me on grounds of my sexual identity or sexual behaviour is taken seriously:
    • Those who wrong me are expected to know that it is hurtful, and are considered accountable whether or not they intended to wrong me.
    • I have easy access to people who understand that this wrong is unacceptable, and who will support me.
    • I have easy access to resources and people to educate someone who wronged me, if I am not feeling up to it.
    • If I am being wronged, I can expect that others who are around will notice
  33. When I express my sexual identity in my daily life, I can reasonably expect not to be considered unstable, unreliable, indecisive, untrustworthy or in need of help.
  34. I can worry about issues specific to people of my sexual identity group without being seen as self-interested, self-seeking or divisive.
  35. I can remain oblivious of the language, culture, history and politics of bisexuality*** and bisexual people*** without feeling in my culture any penalty for such oblivion.
  36. I have the privilege of not being aware of my privileges.

* Cisgender means any person who identifies as the gender they were assigned at birth, i.e. non-transgender or genderqueer.
** Heteropatriarchy means heterosexual male rule.

*** Bisexual = ♥ people of same gender/gender presentations as yourself + ♥ people of different genders/gender presentations as yourself.

READ THIS. this is absolutely and painfully true. painfully. READ THIS.


Wednesday, November 7, 2012

guys, Mary Gonzalez of Texas just got elected Senator. she is openly pansexual.




guys, guys.




(Source: hatliker)